Robot.

Early life

Robot was raised at a orphanage in Henley-on-Thames, England. It was there he learned, from other more HU-man ophans, how to survive on the mean streets through various unsavory means, means including sheep herding and boot shining. Perish!

The college years

The competition

Robot was one of fifty finalists in the 3rd Annual pan-European Whistling Festival Tournament. Encouraged by a strong showing of his fellow orphan-mates at the 4th round in London, Robot laid a woodshed beating on reigning whistling champ Francois McDougall. Spectators later said Robot's steely tones were of such perfection that babies ceased crying, women started crying, and several pigeons died mid-flight.

But victory, unfortunately, did not make it's bed with Robot that year. Heavily favored moving into the semi-finals Robot was upset by a young Swedish girl, Latta Kivosa with rather large breasts. A slight drizzle began the night before the battle between the two up-and-coming master whistlers and continued throughout the day. A strong gust of wind simultaneous blew rain into Robot's whistler -- which instantly shorted out -- and ripped off Latta's poorly made Swedish top, exposing her left breast. It was doom spelled d-0-0-m for Robot.

But all was not lost! His exceptional performance landed him a full ride to the historically black Howard University in Washington DC.

Posible paternity

The robot, Box, from Logan's Run. Trapped in icy cave programed to capture HU-mans and freeze them for later consumption, Box is rumoured to be Robot's father. In the late 70's, riding high off of the critical success of Logan's Run, Box was often seen with ...

"It's my job... to freeze you!"--Box